Amazing Grace
25 Aug 1998 in the year of our Lord Jesus
Two years ago on this day was the day that my life changed forever. It was the day that I met God. I am delighted to tell you how that happened.
Several weeks before that day, a man by the name of Curtis Timsah began to work with me at Pizza Inn. He talked a lot about what I thought as religion and about the end of the world. I was captivated by his words and though I disagreed, I found everything he said compelling and listened intently. I found myself unable to refute anything. But more to the point, as he shared with me about world events and what the Bible describes about the end of this age, I began to see a pattern. I saw that the world was not simply going into chaos, but that there was a concerted plan. The outcry for a new world order fit nicely with what he described as the kingdom of the antichrist. Everything pointed toward the existence of a devil who was the source of all this evil, a higher power who was leading this world into places it didn't understand. Jerusalem is the center of world attention for this very reason-it is God's city and the devil wants it. Well, at this point I decided that if there was a devil, and the evidence made that clear, then the god who told us that there was one must exist. I came home from work one night and told my wife, Tamra, that I thought I was finding religion. I believed in a devil and a god. I was still unsure about what Christians said about Jesus dying for my sins, but I no longer ruled it out.
AMAZING GRACE...
The following Sunday morning, I stayed home from church. I was not feeling well, and besides, I had to pack to move into our new home. About 11 o'clock in the morning, God acted. I knelt down on the couch, asked God to forgive me all my sins and asked Jesus to come into my heart. He did both. "For it is by grace you have been saved, through faith-and this is not from yourselves, it is the gift of God-nor by works, so that no one can boast." Eph 2:8,9 God gave, I only received. What I received was newness of life. I had been declared guilty; now I was given clemency. All that I had been was washed away by the blood of God. I stood up from that couch a new creation of God. I was still James England, and I still had to pack belongings. I still had to go to work that night. But now I know my Creator; he is my best friend.
We moved into our house the following Saturday. This house I consider to be my salvation gift from God. We had been looking for a house to buy and did not qualify for a large enough home because I worked for tips and mortgage companies couldn't count them. I remember Tamra asking for prayer in Sunday School one day that we might be able to find a house if it was God's will. Even though I was an atheist, I somehow believed that prayer. Well, just as we gave up looking until we could buy a large enough home, someone walked into Tamra's work and offered her this house. Miraculously, they offered to let us pay rent for one year toward the purchase price, lowering it to an amount we could qualify for. The same week I met God, he gave me a house. I did not save myself; I came to the end of denying the existence of God and when I did, he put an end to my misery. I was now what I was created to be-his child.
My greatest desire was to begin to read the Bible. I had to put that off until after the move, but what I could do was throw away all the heavy metal music cassettes I had that were not already packed. When we got moved, I threw away the rest. Then I picked up the Bible.
...HOW SWEET THE SOUND
This is what I found. "How sweet are your words to my taste, sweeter than honey in my mouth!" Ps 119:103 This book that I had picked up before and found incomprehensible now came to life. In fact, it was life to me. "A longing fulfilled is sweet to the soul...." Prov 13:19 I found more and more what I had been created to be. My purpose is to love God with all my heart! I wanted to get to know him intimately, and through his word he made that possible. "But when he, the Spirit of truth comes, he will guide you into all truth." Jn 16:13 When I met God, he gave me the Spirit of truth. He has led me into all truth, and the truth is Jesus. Truth is not some ethereal, elusive concept, but in a real sense is a proper noun-a name for God himself. Not only is he the truth, but he is also the way and the life. No one comes to the Father except through him. Jn 14:6 It sounds offensive to some, but it raises joy within my heart to finally hear the truth, to see the way, to find life. "Praise our God, O peoples; let the sound of his praise be heard." Ps 66:8
THAT SAVED A WRETCH LIKE ME!
I have been saved from my own terrible guilt. I was convicted without remedy, and enslaved to continue in my guilt. "At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. But when the kindness and love of God our savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy." Ti 3:3-5 The kindness and love of God is always is there, but we do not see it. When we have our eyes opened, we understand this: "They cried to you and were saved; in you they trusted and were not disappointed." Ps 22:5 We no longer deny God. " Before I met God, I was miserable and did not know it. But now I know what it means to be a slave to human flaw rather than a slave to Christ. "What a wretched man I am! Who will rescue me from this body of death? Thanks be to God-through Jesus Christ our Lord!" Ro 7:24 Another verse describes me before 25 August 1996. "But you did not realize that you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked." Rev 3:17
I ONCE WAS LOST, BUT NOW I'M FOUND...
To be lost and not know it sounds strange, but in my case it was true. I had a good life. I had a wonderful wife and beautiful daughter, a decent place to live, all the necessities of life. I had a wonderful job, and contentment with my income. I am intelligent, and although I failed in engineering school and that door was closed in my life, I thought I was content. But I had rejected the one who created me. Not only had I rejected the truth, but the way to my true purpose in this world. I was running from the one who was trying to find me, shouting lies and covering my ears to drown out his cries. I failed, "For this son of mine was dead and is alive again; he was lost and is found." Lk 15:24
"For the Son of Man came to seek and to save what was lost." Lk 19:10 Isaiah, speaking for the Lord, says "I was found by those who did not seek me; I revealed myself to those who did not ask for me." Ro 10:20 God himself loved me so much that he carried a Roman cross up a hill, was nailed to it, and gave up his life there for me. He was buried, then he rose again, and sought after me my whole life to reveal his kindness and love to me so that I might receive his gift of eternal life, forgiveness of all my sins, and relationship with him.
WAS BLIND, BUT NOW I SEE!
"The Lord sets prisoners free, the Lord gives sight to the blind, the Lord lifts up those who are bowed down, the Lord loves the righteous." Ps 146:8 I had been blind, "ever seeing but never perceiving." Mt 13:14 The Bible further describes how I was before I met God and he changed my life. "For this people's heart has become caused; they hardly hear with their ears, and they have closed their eyes. Otherwise they might see with their eyes, hear with their ears and turn, and I would heal them. Acts 28:27 Well, I finally heard the good news. Indeed, "Like cold water to a weary soul is good news from a distant land." Prov 25:25 I once was blind, but now I see. I now see clearly what my purpose in life is. When I was an atheist, I thought I knew what I was doing in life. I would be an engineer and develop cars and airplanes that would change the world in some small way, that would contribute to the environment with better design. I cannot change the world, and neither can any man alive-except the one who was dead, and now lives. He created this world, and only he can save it. One day he will recreate the universe. His first priority is the hearts of those he created in his own image, those he loves and created this universe for. It is the greatest purpose of God to have intimacy and relationship with us. Our highest purpose is to be adopted as his children, to love our father. Then everything else comes into order.
I am still concerned about this planet; it is handmade by God. I care about endangered species; but this world in its totality is sing and only God can change that. My wife is not just another person, and certainly not another accident of evolution as I used to believe. She is someone created by the loving hand of God; as my wife she is his greatest gift to me except my salvation. God brought Tamra into my life to teach me how to give my whole heart to someone who would give their whole heart to me. Until I met her, I had never known true love or contentment with another person, just loneliness despite a wonderful loving family. The presence of the Spirit of God within her heart melted mine, and I found true love. I shall eternally thank her, for without her love I probably would've been incapable of giving my heart to God. Earlier I said that she was second to my salvation; indeed, she is second to my God. That is the way God requires it. But God is not selfish; because I love God I can more fully love my wife than ever before. I know now that she will not only still love me when I'm 64, but a trillion years from now we will be kneeling in worship to Jesus, hand in hand. Without Christ, I could only love her for a lifetime. Except for what happened two years ago today, I would be in hell. Thank you, my love, for leading me to the cross by your life of love for me. You will take a husband and daughter [and now a son!] with you to heaven.
